I’m not a perfect parent. In fact, I’m far from it. I say the wrong things, do the wrong things, and am learning more and more every day.
And I’m not one to judge.
But I heard a mother say something the other day, and it made every bone in my body cringe. She was walking up to the door of a building, texting on her phone, while her young son walked in front of her. I noticed that they stood at the door for 15-20 seconds, and the son hadn’t opened the door yet. He was staring around, noticing the nice day, looking into the building, and…well, not opening the door. Apparently, his mother expected he would have already opened it. So she blurted out, loud enough for everyone to hear,
What is wrong with you?!?
He was stunned. He didn’t cry or yell back or stomp his feet because he was angry. He just stood there and looked up at his mom. Obviously thinking it was ok just to take in the scenery and move at a slower pace, it took him aback when his mom, who was distracted by something on her phone, snapped at him and degraded his very existence. I’m sure that what he heard was
There is something wrong with you…otherwise, you would’ve opened the door already for me!!
And in that moment, I realized that knowing what not to say to your children doesn’t automatically come to you when you have a child. I guess I thought it did.
So I thought I’d put a list together of things you should never say to your child. Even in jest, these can be damaging to a young mind.
50 Things to Never Say to your Children
1. What’s wrong with you?!?
2. You’ll never amount to anything.
3. I don’t really like you.
4. You’re worthless to me.
5. You’re stupid.
6. I wish you’d never been born.
7. I wish you were more like ____.
8. If you’d just shut up…
9. Stop being loud so I can work…
10. It’s okay to lie a little bit
11. You’re such a disappointment.
12. If you do that again, I’ll hit you.
13. YOU made me this way.
14. YOU caused the problems between your mother and I.
15. You’re dead to me.
16. I don’t love you right now.
17. You’re an idiot.
18. Hard work will never get you anywhere.
19. I hate you.
20. I don’t have time for you.
21. Quit bothering me.
22. Until you fix this problem, I don’t love you.
23. Left up to me, I’d never see you again.
24. You’re not important to me right now.
25. I hate coming to your games.
26. Quit dreaming, that’s never possible.
27. This is your art? It’s awful…
28. Quit being so creative. That’ll never get you anywhere.
29. When you grow up, I hope you’ll be more like your brother/sister.
30. Quit acting like your mother.
31. Your father was a loser, too.
32. If you keep acting like this, your mom and dad might get a divorce.
33. From mother: Don’t listen to your daddy.
34. From dad: Don’t listen to your mother.
35. If you do that again, you’re going to make God not love you anymore.
36. Was it your birthday yesterday?
37. I don’t think I can ever forgive you for what you just did.
38. If you choose to do that, our relationship is over.
39. I’m ashamed to call you my child.
40. Do as I say, not as I do.
41. I know I’m right. There’s nothing you can do or say to convince me otherwise.
42. No, I won’t listen to you.
43. God loves you because you’re good.
44. Go talk to someone else. I’m too busy with work right now.
45. No, I won’t read to you.
46. To boys: real men don’t cry.
47. To girls: don’t cry.
48. You better stop, or I’ll give you something to cry about.
49. Quit being such a little baby.
50. Do what you want, I don’t care.
50 Things to Never Say to your Children is a post from: Life and Theology
Also Read 50 Things You Should Tell Your Children
Also Read 50 Things You Should Tell Your Children
you can add - stop crying or i will give you something to cry for - i was afraid when mom lost her temper;
ReplyDeleteanother version is stopping looking so misterable etc..
wipe that smirk off your face or i will wipe it off for you;
stop talking;you talk too much;you talk rubbish; shut up; if you ever answer me back i will kill you;
when passing a building with high walls or barbed wire around it - thats the mental asylum if you dont behave i will send you in there and they will lock you up and you will never come out;
i had most of the ones you wrote and loads more and it doesn't stop even as an adult; the put downs continue - like today i bought some fruit and veggie plants for my garden and bumped into my parents in the shop; from dad- jesus, sneered and walked off; from mom - what did you buy all that for, what you going to do with it all; tut tut, sneering and looking away
i now have severe depression and bpd