Yesterday, I compiled a list of 50 things you should never tell your child. Ever.
But that’s only half of the story. While there are plenty of things you should not say to your child, there are also plenty of things you should tell them on a habitual basis. I’d be remiss to leave out that part of the story.
Most of these are applicable no matter what the age. Whether your children are 2 or 60, you can and should speak them.
Some of them may need to be uniquely suited if your children are older than 2, though. And some (like #19) may not work if you’re a single parent.
50 things you should tell your children
1. I love you.
2. I will always love you.
3. No matter what you do, you’ll always be my child.
4. I love you, but I’m still going to punish you.
5. Yes, I’ll forgive you.
6. Will you forgive me? I messed up.
7. You’re so valuable to me.
8. Let’s go to church.
9. Yes, I’ll drop what I’m doing to play.
10. No, I’m not too busy.
11. You drew that?!? Amazing!
12. I’m proud of you.
13. You slipped up, but you’re still precious to me.
14. Can we talk?
15. Let’s hang out.
16. You don’t have a choice here. You’re 2 years old.
17. You’re safe with me.
18. Yes, I’ll help.
19. You’re not the most important person in my life…your mom (my wife) (or your dad (my husband)) is.
20. Honoring God is always the right choice.
21. Learning to obey mommy and daddy is important.
22. Let’s pray.
23. Let’s go on a date! (dad to daughter, or mom to son)
24. To boys specifically: Never treat your mother with disrespect. Never.
25. To boys specifically: stand up for yourself.
26. To boys specifically: it’s okay to cry.
27. To boys specifically: it’s okay to be dangerous.
28. To boys specifically: being dangerous can leave you hurt. But playing it safe isn’t what men are called to do.
29. To boys specifically: fight for things that are eternally valuable.
30. To boys specifically: stand up for those who can’t stand up for themselves.
31. To girls specifically: You’re worth far more than rubies.
32. To girls specifically: you’re beautiful. Don’t let anyone tell you you’re not.
33. To girls specifically: you’re my princess, and you always will be.
34. Love those that nobody else loves.
35. Love others more than you love yourself.
36. Love and respect those who don’t love or respect you.
37. Serve others like your life depended on it.
38. Learn to respect those in authority over you. Life will be much easier if you do.
39. There is no problem so big that you can’t come to me.
40. You’ll never do anything to lose my love.
41. You have so many gifts. Can I help you use them?
42. I will always want what is best for you.
43. It’s okay if you mess up. I mess up, too.
44. No matter where you are or what you’ve done, if something’s wrong, call me. I’ll come running.
45. I don’t care if your friends get to do that. I’m your parent, not theirs.
46. Be a good friend. Others will love you for it.
47. It’s okay to be upset.
48. You can never do anything so bad that God would desert you.
49. You’re a ____ (insert your last name), and ____s (insert your last name again) don’t back down from our convictions.
50. Your mom and dad aren’t perfect. But we love you unconditionally.
Usually your right on the money, however I don't agree with everything on this list. I don't believe we should differentiate how we treat girls and boys. What you say to one should go for the other. For one,it's not important for girls to feel beautiful or to believe that this is important. The media has gone to far in this as it is. #19-this is just wrong. #23 is just weird. #27 and #28-WHAT? Are you telling them it's ok to go jump off of a bridge or building cause "playing it safe isn’t what men are called to do"? #31-why are we telling a child that they have a monetary worth? #33-telling a girl she is a princess, pfff come on, unreal expectations! #41-???? #44-are you giving them permission to do something wrong? And jeez, they need to learn that when they make mistakes they better make amends for them. Not that they are going to be protected by mommy or daddy every time. Accountability!
ReplyDeleteThis is the first article I have read. I don't know if this is typical of your opinions.
ReplyDeleteI also don't agree with everything on this list. I don't believe we should differentiate how we treat people, along with quite a few other statements listed. Some of the things on this list are just plain ridiculous or down right archaic ! In my opinion not very good advice. I am not a judgmental person. Normally I would not say anything if I can't say something positive , but I am a firm believer in"everyone has a right to their opinion" & "take what you can use and leave the rest." I am happy to have already raised 4 children as such I am not looking for any advice.
#19 is not wrong...kids don't need to grow up believing they are the center of the universe. They need to learn there are some things more important. When the kids are grown and gone, all I will have is my relationship w/ my husband, it is THAT important. That doesn't mean the kids get neglected, just they don't have to be self-centered. Nice list, I appreciate seeing it in print!!
ReplyDeleteSweetheart Lynn Stoner, i guess the writer has done an extremely amazing work by compiling these carefully knitted 50 statements. You may of course question the validity of some of these phrases but dear, if you interpret all of them with maximum liberal interpretation possible then you will agree with all of them. A dad asking her darling daughter out for a date will simply make her feel how immensely pretty and deserving she is. this statement might be a token of love, affection, concern, appreciation...all at once. interpret these statements very positively and your heart will agree to each one of them.
ReplyDeletelove and regards.